Sex is one of the most basic needs of any human.  It’s right up there with air, water, and food.  And in the case of all four, having something that is objectively better is, well, better.  No one wants to breathe bad, dirty air, drink gross water, eat stale food, or have mediocre sex.  As a cookbook tells you how to make better food, this article focuses on tips for having better sex.  Many aspects of sex are often overlooked.  And it’s easy for couples to fall into a routine, which over time can degrade the quality of sex.

Physical conditions

The first thing on the list of tips for having better sex is physical conditions and considerations.  The human body is a genuinely fantastic machine, but it has flaws.  For example, the human body is terrible at multitasking.  That is why they recommend waiting 30 minutes after eating to take a swim.  The body struggles to digest food and perform physically at the same time.  This is true for sex as well.  Having sex on an empty stomach ensures that blood gets to all the parts of the body crucial to the act of sex.

Furthermore, an empty stomach improves flexibility and prevents things like indigestion from interfering with the experience.  Other physical conditions that can have a negative effect on sex are poor health and intoxication.  Diet and exercise play a massive role in keeping the body working right and keeping you at peak sexual performance.  Doing fifteen to thirty minutes of cardio on days you are going to have sex can help improve endurance, open up blood vessels, and give you better stamina.  Alcohol thins the blood and can reduce sexual performance, so try not to drink on days you plan to have sex. 

prep work

In reference to prep work, I’m not talking about foreplay.  That will come later.  I am talking about finding out what your partner likes.  Talk about sex with your significant other.  Find out what they like and dislike.  Find out what their fantasies are.  If they aren’t sure, explore the topic together.  Read erotica, watch YouTube videos about sex, and look up and try new sex positions.  Most long-term relationships have a habit of falling into a routine.  Break that routine by researching new things to try. 

Of course, if you or your partner is too reserved to have open conversations about sex, doing any prep work can be challenging. (click here to read about better bedroom communication) One way to get comfortable talking about sex is to read erotica out loud to each other.  It will make the topic less taboo and, over time, should open up a whole new way to explore each other’s sexual appetites.  Other prep work to consider is planning a fancy date or setting up a sexy playlist.  Maybe light some scented candles.  Plan to shake things up a bit and explore new options.  You could even go as far as researching how to give your partner a sexy massage. 

Environment

Long-term couples usually fall into the routine of having sex in the bedroom at night.  One tip for having better sex is to change up your environment.  How about morning sex bent over the bathroom counter while getting ready for the day?  Or in the back seat of a car.  Changing locations can bring excitement to your sex life, making for much better sex.  Try to be a little bit spontaneous with your timing and locations.  Try using different furniture.  Have sex on the kitchen counter.  When trying new places, it’s essential to be safe and comfortable, don’t try to force it.

Don’t take it too seriously.

This may seem opposite to what you were taught about sex but try not to take it too seriously.  You’re not competing at the Olympics; it’s sex.  You should be able to get comfortable and laugh and play with your partner.  The emotional component of sex is far more potent in couples who have light-hearted sex.  Start trying to enjoy the moment outside of the actual act of sex.  Relaxed, comfortable, and fun sex is far better than rigid and uniform sex. 

Foreplay

You knew this would be on the list, and still, it’s the number one contributing factor when we ask people about good sex.  Foreplay is overlooked by many couples, especially if they have fallen into a routine.  Foreplay can include many other elements on this list and doesn’t have to start when your pants come off.  Start your foreplay early.  Talk dirty to your partner throughout the day.  Try and keep their mind on sex all day long.  Once the pants come off, don’t forget the touching and kissing.  Try out some of your combined fantasies.  Try to incorporate all five senses.  Burn a scented candle or incense, or use some good-smelling body lotion.  Touch your partner with your hands or other things like feathers or soft cloth.  Turn the lights down low and wear something sexy.  Put on some slow jazz in the background.  Stimulate your partner’s senses until they are begging for sex.

None of these tips for better sex require a whole lot of effort.  There’s so much information on the internet that you could probably do all your research by accident.  The biggest challenge for most couples is communicating their sexual desires and needs.  With a little bit of work, that can be overcome.  Knowing what you and your partner like can help steer your sex life in a funnier, more exciting direction.